| Writer's Block: God For a Day |
[Aug. 9th, 2008|02:46 am] |
HAHAHAHA
One simple answer: I'd get rid of religions, tell people to live their lives to the fullest and love, respect and care for those around them.
How's that for an atheist answer ;)
Anyways, I hereby consign the lead singer of Disturbed to teh hotness box along with Trent Reznor and other rock hotties. :D
Devin
Won't go to heaven
She's just another lost soul,
About to be mine again
Leave her
we will receive her
It is beyond your control
will you ever meet again
Devin
One of eleven
Who had been rendered unwhole
As a little child,
she was taken
and then forsaken
you will remember it all
Let it fill your mind again
[Chorus:]
Devin lies beyond this portal
take the word of one immortal
Give your soul to me
For eternity
release your life
to begin another time with her
End your grief with me
there's another way
release your life
take your place inside the fire with her
Sever
Now and forever
you're just another lost soul about to be mine again
see her, you'll never free her
you must surrender it all
If you'd like to meet again
Fire
For your desire
As she begins to turn cold for the final time
you will shiver
till you deliver
you will remember it all
Let it fill your mind again
[Chorus]
Give your soul to me
For eternity
release your life
to begin another time with her
End your grief with me
there's another way
release your life
take your place inside the fire with her
Devin
One of eleven
Who had been rendered unwhole
As a little child
she was taken,
and then forsaken
you will remember it all
Let it fill your mind again
-Disturbed "Inside the Fire"
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| Ehhh, its been awhile... |
[Jul. 31st, 2008|04:31 am] |
Practically a year between posts. Woah I am getting incredibly lazy bones about this stuff *winces* But then again I think I forgot how useful this bloggy thing is for moi. Reading the last entry I realized that I tend to get mid-summer blues from being all cooped up, and thus starts the crazy thoughts.
Damn I've got a lot of those running around in my head as of late.
But one thing I do realize is I need to be doing more about my life, I'm kinda just sitting here on the ride and not involving myself as I once did. In some ways I think this is a more in the background way for my ever present self-hatred and depression to manifest itself. Instead of feeling shitty, I feel unworthy, I withdraw and the more I withdraw, the more the world doesn't bother itself with me, Which in the end further compounds the feelings of worthlessness and spins that wheel just a little quicker.
Thus I've managed to effectively silence and isolate myself gradually over the past year and a half, which coincides to a certain extent to the beginning of my LTR. However I know that's not the cause, rather I think I've used it as an excuse, another cloaking device to hide myself from the world. What scares me with this, is that sooner or later the bf will realize this or that he'll finally get sick of my up and down, emotional rollercoaster and decide he wants the fuck off, and who could honestly blame him?
Anyways, this is my somewhat public kick-in-the-ass to get myself in gear, before its too late...
Happy thoughts!
:D |
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| I shouldn't... |
[Jul. 12th, 2007|01:10 am] |
...Stay up so late alone.
My thoughts begin to wander, forwards, backwards. Contemplating events, wishes and dreams. This isn't such a questionable activity except, it's done late at night.
Why does this make it such a troublesome thing?
Because when such things are done late at night, ones thoughts turn to ideas and other things that are ususally relegated to the "Crazy thoughts/ How bout you go fuck you life up?" bin of stuff.
But no matter, it doesn't really matter anyways. It's just that some days/nights the past comes back to haunt me, sometimes in more concrete fashions than mere thoughts. And for a fact I like to keep my past dead and buried, hence I don't tend to revive old frienships and such.
Enough the allusions etc, Today was a quiet enough day, but that seems to be my summers in a nut shell. Ill be spending the next five or six days on my own, with the exception of two visits with my Teddy Bear. Otherwise it's moi and the puppies left to our own devices.
Fun fun *sarcasm*
Maybe I'll try to get something done, write a bit, not be such a lazy ass...
Laterz |
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| Exams are over, commence LAZY TIME! Plus- Unlocked Entries |
[Apr. 30th, 2007|01:07 am] |
You know, this school has yet to truly teach me a lesson about procrastination... I got an eighty in history... Through sheer luck or not I do not know, but in a way I probably do not deserve that grade lol.
The question is will I get just as high in my other courses. If I do I'll probably piss myself laughing, because then technically this school isn't so hard after all since really I'm not the most intelligent of people out there.
Anyways, I've unlocked a bunch of old entries which I don't care if anyone sees anymore. If you are going to scroll down to read them, take them with a grain of salt. They were written in emotional, tense and often barely sane times. Any names or direct references should also be ignored, since I haven't gone through the entries to make sure there aren't any. I'm not very worried anyways since the events that inspired many of those entries occured over two years ago (wow time flies when you're having fun)And honestly, I am not the girl I was back then.
In other news I'm moving out of rez in about 32 hours or so, on the one hand in looking forward to being home with my brothers and sisters again (for the un-iniated thats my pack of golden retreivers) But I will miss the freedom of rez and I'll miss my teddy bear :(
I will not miss the stinky mess that is rez though, and strange housemates...
This song by nine inch nails is pretty damn good, a bit haunting but good all the same. Seems like Year Zero will be an awesome record, but I wouldn't expect much less fron Reznor and crew. Amazing lyrics too, but nothing unsual there...
Dust to dust,
Ashes in your hair remind me
What it feels like
And I won't feel again
Night descends
Could I have been a better person
If I could only do it all again
And the sky is filled with light
Can you see it?
All the black is really white
If you believe it
And the longing that you feel
You know none of this is real
You will find a better a place
In this twilight
In this Twillight- Nine Inch Nails |
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| Woops ^_^; |
[Apr. 22nd, 2007|08:55 pm] |
So it seems I've forgotten to post to here for a few months atleast. What can I say, Ive been busy :P
Things that I've been up to:
1. Hanging out with my spiffy new boyfriend (well he is so new anymore, it'll be three months as of the 26th) I've gotta come up with a nickname for him, I don't think he'll apreciae direct referencing. ^_^;
2. Hanging out with everyone else (as in lazing around H-Wing) and dicking around with my computer which is slowly dyiiiing, the power cord no longer works *bawls*
3. School when I absolutely must, otherwise I'm doing either 1 or 2. At th moment it is exam time (thats right I'm only posting here because I don't want to study for my last two exams on Wesneday)
Add into that list shopping and maybe a party or two and you can see why I haven't been posting here much. (Althoug oddly enough I wrote in my own diary about the amusing story of how my Teddy Bear and I got together.Thats right, I shall call him Teddy Bear, I'm sure his ears are burning right now, poor baby.)
Biomedical Ethics is an insufferable course, DONT TAKE IT... As all philosophy classes, It looks interesting from the outside, but on the inside the mind numbing procedure or argument, counter argument, counter-counter-counter argument tends to GET OLD!!!
That was random... w/e Anyways, I move out of Rez quite possibly for the last time on the 1st. It's much more cost effective to live just of campus, cheaper and cleaner and prettier.
There only two weeks till my 20th Birthday, wtf I'm getting OLD :S :( Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
Okay only in numerical values, because my mental age is about 7 these days. THats pretty good considering TB's (Teddy Bear) is only about 4 or 5. It's adorable though.
Anyways methinks I should actually get some work done.
Tah-Tah!
P.S. Methinks ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=91.6) bunnychelleshould update her journal *Kicks* |
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| Happiness and depression |
[Nov. 13th, 2006|05:20 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | French Class | ] |
| [ | Mood |
| |  cranky | ] |
| [ | Noise |
| | Teacher Rambling on about an assignement | ] |
So I keep shifting back in forth between a good mood and a very bad one. I seem to be exibiting the very same hermitage tendencies as BunnyChelle... But I wont get into it too much. I've got essays comming out of my ying-yang and I can't seem to get my mind to work properly on them at all.
No matter, I'll probably get them done in time.
I got my grades back for all my classes an assignements. Stats: 86, Anthro 85, Health 73 (with an 95% on my assignement) French 85 and 70 in English (an odd reversal from my usual lol)
Anyways good things overall now I've got to get back to class...French class never seems to end and damnnit I've got the most massive cravings for Sour Watermellon candies. |
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| Posting From Anthropology Class |
[Oct. 26th, 2006|12:16 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Anthro Class | ] |
| [ | Mood |
| |  calm | ] |
| [ | Noise |
| | soundtrack of the movie we're watching in class | ] |
I really could launch into a tirade about western ideologies and their stupid ideas and ethnocentrism, but I wont lol. Life has been alright lately, as long as you don't consider my inherently bad luck with men. The last guy ended, well I can't say badly, it just kinda dropped off. We don't even acknowledge each other in the hallways anymore. This is somewhat amusing but also disconcerting (although the brokeback mountain pictures he posted on Facebook were even more so) Yeah, I get the bizare ones, story of my fracking life Anyways, I just finished my midterms, I think i did fairly well though or atleast I hope so. I've been quite lazy recently with classes and such, so im gonna have to work harder in the next comming weeks since i have atleast 2 or 3 essays to do. Thus i should get back to class! Later |
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| Thats what I get for trying to cheat... ^_^; |
[Jun. 17th, 2006|02:38 pm] |
You know all those sunless, daily moisterizing tanners that are on the market now. Well i figured hey, less of s chance to fuck up with streaks and stuff and more colour to my otherwise deathly pale skin without skin cancer!
Well I should read labels a bit better next time.
See this stuff I bought, it has sweet almond oil in it. Which is all nice and good if im putting it on, say my legs and arms, because they arent that sensitive to something that almonds in it (which im slightly SLIGHTLY, allergic to)
But I had to put it on my face yesterday, and not once like i did to the rest of my body. Noooooo I had to put it on TWICE... the first time, nothing happened, I was fiiiiiiiiiine. The second time I put it on before bed. Lo and behold when I wake up to go pee at 4:30 in the morning and look at my self in the mirror I look like I got badly sunburned and my face is all swollen and ITCHY
-Insert slew of curses here-
Atleast I had some hydrocortinsone cream, since i seem not to be able to avoid the million things Im allergic to...
It still itches like a bitch -_-;;;;;;
What else has hapened to me? Not much else... Hoping to get out of the house very soon, maybe in about two weeks or so I'll head down to T.O. visit Sparkles and company :D
I hope...lol |
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| Summer |
[May. 30th, 2006|10:58 pm] |
It's amazing what even a few days of quiet reflection can make you realize, and the feelings that can be resolved in such a time. Somethings that lurk beneath the surface can only be resolved during these times.
And damn it's nice when that happens ^_^
After a topsy-turvy second semester, I have finally emerged maybe slightly wiser and ready to have an awesome albeit quiet summer. Of course I'm gonna miss all my amazing girls (and boys) and the campus itself but the break will make it all better to return to in september.
Gives me plenty of time to get into shape too :D
Jesus the Geico Gecko has been made uber cute 0.0 But oddly disturbing as well with his little monologue. The little reptile has it's own blog for crying out loud!
I can't wait till you come home bunnychelle, I'm looking forward to the party and the camping :D
Same goes for you Sparkles!
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| Evil? Nooooooooooooo |
[Apr. 4th, 2006|09:44 pm] |
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test
Just sitting in the H-Wing of the school with a group of friends and decided to update this baby. I also had to show off my evilness measured by Dante's standards which is obviously up there. Though I must admit I didn't expect to be as bad as the results I got... Oh Well, onwards with the entry!
Well it's the end of the year, only three days left of classes then two weeks of studying before my exams (Eeeek) Then theres the big Rez move out sometimes after the 27th and whatever last parties in honour of Sparkles birthday and the end of school.
In other news, I'm single again! Been so for about a month and I'm absolutely loving it. Less time worrying about a guy, more time spent out with my wonderful friends and I get to look at other guys now, guilt free... Not that that didn't stop me in the first place ;) On the friends note I have to really thank them for keeping me afloat and realistic for that short period after the breakup. Friends like these only reaffirm the fact that my life is really damn good at the moment. Same goes for my housemates who have quite literally become my sisters over the course of this school year. I'm going to miss them so much this summer, I'll be an only child in a big house of dogs again!
Overall this year has been one of the best years of my life, I've experienced so many new things, met so many amazing people and have had an overall experience that I will be wont to forget for awhile. And as far as I'm concerned it could only get better. I plan on trying to work full time for the summer, I want to pay off the loan from this year so I don't get killed with massive bank interest ( or my parents for that manner)Maybe I'll treat myself to a 30 Gb mp3 player since the CD mp3 player is starting to get archaic, or maybe some clothes and shoes :D
Anyways I should actually get a bit of work done tonight so I'm off.
Later Dayz! |
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